It’s Breaking News

News channels are really blaring with breaking news all the day around and there is a movie coming up with the name “It’s Breaking News“. Below is a funny excerpt from such a news channel covering “No News“

The NDTV ace anchorman Pranoy Roy began “We take you to Nair who is waiting to give on-the –spot coverage of the proceedings at CWC head quarters. Over to you Nair.”
“Thank you Pranoy. I’m standing outside the main gate of the Congress head quarters. It is quiet here. Four DTC buses passed northward in the last half an hour and two private cars passed southward. The traffic outside is proceeding smoothly without giving a clue to the outcome of the crucial CWC meeting on Indo-US Nuclear deal. Delhi is agog with rumors that nothing is likely to come out of the meeting. A senior congressman who talked on the condition of anonymity said he had no comments to offer. But another party spokesperson said that he would neither confirm nor deny that nothing is likely to come out of the meeting. There is a tremendous excitement because nothing is happening.”
“Thank you Nair. We shall revert to you soon. Let’s go over to Sheila who is waiting outside the CPM head quarters. Sheila, what have you there?”

“Good morning Pranoy. The situation is very fluid and nobody wants to talk about it. Jyoti Basu was first to arrive, followed by Buddhadeva, Sitaram Yetchury, Bardhan and Karat. The sequence of the arrival, some say, carries a great significance though the party spokesman tried to down play it. There was a flutter when the news broke out that there was no water on the tap at the premises. The CNN and BBC reporters rushed to interview the tea-boy but he was closeted in an all-important emergency meeting with the kitchen staff. So Pranoy, the moment I get a confirmation that nothing is likely to happen I shall get back to you.”
“That’s good work Sheila. Let’s go over to Deepika who is outside the Sonia’s residence. Can you hear me Deepika?’
“Yes Pranoy, I can.”
“Can you confirm that nothing is happening at Sonia’s residence?”
“Well, Pranoy, Sonia’s residence has been a bee-hive of activity since morning. The Prime Minister visited the place at 8’oclock in the morning. Singhvi has been in and out several times. Mani Shankar Iyer is in right now. The phone rang thrice in the past 30 minutes and it is not known who spoke to whom. Sonia’s car is parked in the compound but the driver is not available for comments. But it is reliably learnt that he had a worried look on his face when he drove the vehicle into the parking area. Sources close to driver say that he will be here soon unless he IS cornered by the BBC reporter for a quick fire interview at the traffic signal near Connaught Place. No further developments have taken place. Any questions, Pranoy?”
“No Deepika. Keep up the good job. To round up, this is Pranoy bidding you good bye with news, that the situation on the nuke-deal front continues to remain fluid. Join us on a further update at 11 o’clock tonight.”

And finally a video on No News which any ways NDTV was following

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